|C.S. Lewis and wife, Joy Davidman Gresham|
It seems that grief comes in different incarnations for each of us. Just this week, I read a post by Mary DeMuth about feeling abandoned by God when she moved to France: http://www.marydemuth.com/2012/09/sometimes-god-is-far-heres-why/. It’s easy to make light of this grief, but Mary shared on my FB wall that she even suffered PTSD from some events that occurred there.
In A Grief Observed, C.S. Lewis chronicled his own grief when his wife, Joy Davidman Gresham, died of bone cancer. I wonder if we don’t all reach this point in life, when we question the goodness of God. This quote is very raw, yet something many of us have felt at one point or another, if we’re honest.
“Meanwhile, where is God?…Go to him when your need is desperate, when all other help is vain, and what do you find? A door slammed in your face, and a sound of bolting and double bolting on the inside. After that, silence. You may as well turn away…There are no lights in the windows. It might be an empty house. Was it ever inhabited? It seemed so once. And that seeming was as strong as this. What can this mean? Why is He so present a commander in our time of prosperity and so very absent a help in time of trouble?…
Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not ‘So there’s no God after all,’ but ‘So this is what God’s really like. Deceive yourself no longer.'”
–C.S. Lewis–A GRIEF OBSERVED
I know this seems hopeless. I seriously debated posting only this quote, without the rest of the book (hope you can check it out and read it with me!). But I have a question for you today:
****Have you ever felt this way? And how did you find the strength to keep going? Please share with those who might be feeling exactly the way Lewis did!****